The Reason...
August 30th, 2012 (Thursday)
It is amazing what God can really do to his own people! I was skeptical about God when I was still in Malaysia about his very existence even though I have already been a Christian for nearly most of my life. I can't even remember when did I first became a Christian - I have just been following everyone, my sisters, my friends and teachers.
I did not really choose, I simply follow the flow. As I grew older, I get to understand that there are choices that we can make and of course, with choices we make, there will be consequences following behind ~ whether good or bad. We will have to accept it, right? Anyway, it's us who made the choices.
I have made many choices in my life-time. Well, to assure you, I am NOT really that old, hahaha... I am still young at heart and overall, I am still young!! ;) (*wink*wink)
Coming here to New Zealand, I have chosen to leave my family and friends behind, my job and my everyday life. I have totally no idea what is awaiting me here and I do not even know what the future will be like, especially at this age of mine. (Don't ask, just that I may need to restart all over when I go back, and that actually is a waste of time for me..., I was reminded everyday about that when I looked at the mirror or when I talked to my family. *sighhhh...)
Before coming here to NZ, I kind of have a deal with God ~ asking him to grant me the permission to leave my home country and to do his will and to obey and follow wherever he leads me to, I will listen and obey, PROVIDED that a list of things are achieved by him. And you know what? Wow!! Yeah!!! He fulfilled every single one of the list! Well, the list is mostly about my family that I have been praying for and finally I have to 'finally' leave.
The truth is I was happy to leave because it has been my dream to want to go travel and really leave the country. I was kind of jealous and always have been wanting to live a life like my friends - going overseas, working and living overseas, travelling, sight-seeing BUT I guess it's not as it seems when you are alone in a foreign country.
Yeah, it is true that I am happy to be 'free' of my family 'hovering' over every little thing you do, comparing or lecturing you but the truth is I miss them a lot here and now. It is the warmth, the love, the care & concern, the competition, the laughter, the yelling, the fights and every little small that brings us together and we are called a family. Without their support and not having them praying for me, I guess, I have long since been a 'fallen angel'.
Errrmmm... not that I mean that I am an angel, well sometimes I am my own devil, too!! I wouldn't say that I am the black sheep of the family because I am NOT, it's just that I am a little different compared to my siblings and my cousins, and this makes me ~ me.
I especially dedicate this page to my family and friends who knew me and have supported me through my life and i really want to say a big thank you and let me tell you, I love you all, you know who you are. No need for me to put names, I will be unable to finish saying thanks and send all my love and hugs. Yes, muchos abrazos... ;)
It is amazing what God can really do to his own people! I was skeptical about God when I was still in Malaysia about his very existence even though I have already been a Christian for nearly most of my life. I can't even remember when did I first became a Christian - I have just been following everyone, my sisters, my friends and teachers.
I did not really choose, I simply follow the flow. As I grew older, I get to understand that there are choices that we can make and of course, with choices we make, there will be consequences following behind ~ whether good or bad. We will have to accept it, right? Anyway, it's us who made the choices.
I have made many choices in my life-time. Well, to assure you, I am NOT really that old, hahaha... I am still young at heart and overall, I am still young!! ;) (*wink*wink)
Coming here to New Zealand, I have chosen to leave my family and friends behind, my job and my everyday life. I have totally no idea what is awaiting me here and I do not even know what the future will be like, especially at this age of mine. (Don't ask, just that I may need to restart all over when I go back, and that actually is a waste of time for me..., I was reminded everyday about that when I looked at the mirror or when I talked to my family. *sighhhh...)
Before coming here to NZ, I kind of have a deal with God ~ asking him to grant me the permission to leave my home country and to do his will and to obey and follow wherever he leads me to, I will listen and obey, PROVIDED that a list of things are achieved by him. And you know what? Wow!! Yeah!!! He fulfilled every single one of the list! Well, the list is mostly about my family that I have been praying for and finally I have to 'finally' leave.
The truth is I was happy to leave because it has been my dream to want to go travel and really leave the country. I was kind of jealous and always have been wanting to live a life like my friends - going overseas, working and living overseas, travelling, sight-seeing BUT I guess it's not as it seems when you are alone in a foreign country.
Yeah, it is true that I am happy to be 'free' of my family 'hovering' over every little thing you do, comparing or lecturing you but the truth is I miss them a lot here and now. It is the warmth, the love, the care & concern, the competition, the laughter, the yelling, the fights and every little small that brings us together and we are called a family. Without their support and not having them praying for me, I guess, I have long since been a 'fallen angel'.
Errrmmm... not that I mean that I am an angel, well sometimes I am my own devil, too!! I wouldn't say that I am the black sheep of the family because I am NOT, it's just that I am a little different compared to my siblings and my cousins, and this makes me ~ me.
I especially dedicate this page to my family and friends who knew me and have supported me through my life and i really want to say a big thank you and let me tell you, I love you all, you know who you are. No need for me to put names, I will be unable to finish saying thanks and send all my love and hugs. Yes, muchos abrazos... ;)
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| This is me when I first arrived Christchurch, NZ. |
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